The Sordid Lessons of Kinderläden at Unherd

On cutting off the drunk drivers of the left. In my book, Here Be Monsters: How To Fight Capitalism Instead of Each Other, I wrote about a particularly disturbing moment in the history of Leftism, the Kinderläden. I’ve now expanded upon that topic for an essay published today at Unherd: Every Leftist project that has…


On cutting off the drunk drivers of the left.

In my book, Here Be Monsters: How To Fight Capitalism Instead of Each Other, I wrote about a particularly disturbing moment in the history of Leftism, the Kinderläden.

I’ve now expanded upon that topic for an essay published today at Unherd:

Every Leftist project that has bettered people’s lives was born from the radical imagination: the eight-hour work day, the now-disappeared family wage, the end of the transatlantic slave trade. The Left is always the first to point out that states described as natural, or inevitable, can in fact be changed. But the radical imagination can backfire.

This is particularly the case when Leftists try to either remake the psyche or recalibrate the most intimate of our social relationships. Recently, projects to reconstruct (or abolish) family relations have come back into fashion. Sophie Lewis, for instance, asserts that the family is part of a “traditional practice of grooming kids into cis-genderism and heterosexuality”, which demands to “inseminate the minds of kids” with sex-based pronouns. M.E. O’Brien, meanwhile, has argued that the family is a primary enemy of “gender and sexual freedom” that ought to be replaced with “communes”. Both are supporters of “youth liberation”.

What our current family abolitionists don’t acknowledge, however, is that the Left does not have a good record when it comes to changing society through children. In fact, some radical projects centred on them have gone very, very wrong. The late Sixties offers an illustrative, if extreme, case: that of the West German Kinderläden, or “children shops”.

It’s the first essay of mine published with them, and I definitely hope there will be many others.

When I first learned of the Kinderläden1 from another leftist, I was as shocked as she was. Maybe shocked isn’t the right word: we’d both felt as if everything we’d known about the left suddenly seemed untrue.

She’s no longer a leftist, and I completely understand why. The parallels between the Frankfurt School’s complete abandonment of class and material analysis in favor of changing social forms and “structures” and the current social justice identitarianism are impossible to ignore. Back then, they thought you could stop fascism and undermine capitalism by getting rid of sexual inhibitions; now, they think you can stop fascism and transform capitalism by making people use each other’s chosen pronouns.

The real problem with this way of thinking isn’t the projects themselves. I’m absolutely indifferent to the new gender framework, since it’s clear it will change again (and again, and again) over my lifetime. Nor do I have any strong feelings about the psycho-sexual framework — some of us could definitely benefit from fewer inhibitions, while I think others could definitely do less harm if they had more of them.

The real problem is with the target — children. Changing the way an adult thinks requires coming up with a good argument, reasoning well, and taking into account their counter-arguments. Children don’t have the skills or the experience to question or even to notice when they are being indoctrinated and essentially experimented upon, which is specifically why the new — and old — social change ideologies target them in the first place.

The most remarkable thing about the Kinderladen movement for me was how the parents themselves admitted how trapped they’d felt in an “Emperor’s New Clothes” moment. Many had quite a few misgivings about encouraging their children to have sex with each other and even with adults, but were afraid of appearing “reactionary” or admitting that they even had doubts. I think the same is happening now for many in regards to these new ideological forms.

I’m bracing for some wild anger about this essay from other leftists, but I’ve dealt with this before. Their reactions will be precisely the sort you get when you cut off an alcoholic from their liquor and take away their car keys so they can’t drunk drive home. By doing so, you’re not actually causing them to change — only they can do that — but you’re at least reducing the likelihood they’ll do serious harm to themselves or to others that night.

You can read the entire essay here (no paywall unless you’ve already read ten articles on the site this month). You can also read more about the strange history of psycho-sexual delusions in Germany from German historian Dagmar Herzog’s excellent book, Sex After Fascism. And of course, you can read my book to see how all this plays out into a larger problem with leftism and what we can do about it.

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1

Kinderläden is the plural, Kinderladen is singular. This spelling convention didn’t initially carry over into the essay’s publication.

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Responses to “The Sordid Lessons of Kinderläden at Unherd”

  1. Benn

    “Changing the way an adult thinks requires coming up with a good argument, reasoning well, and taking into account their counter-arguments.”

    Has anyone experienced this? I never have. Changes of mind have come from the heart, not reason. If anything, reasoned arguements have entrenched opinions, but that might just be my being crap at arguing. And spelling. And grammar. People tend to rationalise their feelings, which is why getting them while they are still malleable is better.

    1. Rhyd Wildermuth

      I have. Many of the most significant ideological and perception changes in my life came as an adult and through reasoning, often also through argument. But in my view, reason isn’t just an intellectual exercise, since our minds are part of our bodies.

  2. Katy Eyre

    This makes me think of Ursula le Guin’s The Dispossessed where I loved all the ideas except the break up of the family, all the children separated from their parents -‘everyone’s children’, something I hadn’t previously known was a leftist project (my own ignorance entirely).

    Also in Brave New World, but there at least it’s obvious it’s unsettling.

    1. Rhyd Wildermuth

      Yes, absolutely. I think that’s why she subtitled it “an ambiguous utopia.” Even as an anarchist, I realized I would really not prefer to live in that kind of society, despite it being exactly an “ideal” anarchist one.

    2. Rosie Whinray

      Yes, and I think Le Guin implicitly critiques (or at least interrogates) this system within the plot too- like many other plot points, the question becomes ‘what do we do when it doesn’t work?’

  3. Helen

    I’m a paying subscriber to Unherd but have struggled to go there recently, seeing their general bias, particularly among readers, regarding Israel. But it’s great they’re publishing you, Rhyd, and I’ll be interested to see what the response is there to your work.

    1. Rhyd Wildermuth

      This has happened for a lot of journals lately, yes, and not just on Israel. I feel quite estranged from all of them, but I long ago stopped thinking I need to agree with an outlet to actually publish there (wish the rest of the left would understand this…).

      All that being said, I will likely -not- read the comments there. 🙂

      1. Helen

        I’ve just had a look and, yes, maybe best not to… Eek!

  4. Anonymous
    1. Rhyd Wildermuth

      Yes, strange times. I doubt many of their readers might necessarily also like my other writing, though I think about a quarter of my readership is Christian in some form or another.

      And I do like to remind people that the communist party which asked Marx to write the Communist Manifesto was a merger of two groups, the larger part being the “League of the Just,” which was a Catholic communist group. And as John Michael Greer likes to say, “communism is a Christian heresy.”

  5. Dave Pollard

    A valuable reminder of the dangers of extremist ideology of any kind, and I think Social Justice Identarianism is a brilliant label for some adherents of it.

    But please be careful with UnHerd. I know Paul Kingsnorth has been caught up in it as he has embraced anti-modernism. But most of the writers on it are hard-right conservatives and many are outright racists, including those propagating disgusting anti-Moslem hate and propaganda about events in Gaza. This article in the Guardian sounds the alarm about getting into bed with them: https://www.theguardian.com/media/2023/oct/28/loud-and-uncowed-how-unherd-owner-paul-marshall-became-britains-newest-media-mogul

    1. Rhyd Wildermuth

      To be clear, I’m not the only leftist who has written there. Freddie DeBoer also does, for example.

      I had read the Guardian article a week after I pitched the essay, but found the author’s argument unpersuasive and quite alarmist, especially in how he attempted to make Unherd’s massive readership (2 million unique visitors per month, much more than the New Statesmen) as something that should be “worrisome.” All major media outlets are owned or funded by very rich people with establishment politics, and Unherd is now a major one that millions of people read, rather than a fringe journal.

      Also, as you know, there are very few leftist journals or publishers that will even dare critique social justice identitarianism right now. Perhaps you’ve noticed that my own book hasn’t appeared in any journals and is barely even being promoted by the publisher currently. There’s a bit of a blacklisting on this topic, but Unherd was more than willing to work with me and did not even try to change the slightest bit of my defenses of leftism itself.

  6. Christina Waggaman

    Great essay, and I appreciate the historical research you put into your work. I actually think these are huge reasons (abolishing the nuclear family and the creepier parts of sex positivity) why many people who support left-leaning policy around healthcare, student debt, and labor rights are wary of what is called leftism is now. It’s become a counterculture of people rebelling against very specific childhood traumas involving their Christian upbringing, rather than a politics.

    Also, I think it’s great you write for Unherd. I don’t like this leftist presupposition that if you write in a publication that features right wing writers, that you are going to catch some fascist disease and be forever tainted by association. The idea that people who read right wing publications are bad and can never be persuaded by a leftist idea feels like some kind of Calvinist predetermination thing.

    I remember in the 2020 election, when it looked like Warren was going to drop out of the Democratic primary, there was some talk among my Sanders supporting friends of reaching out to Warren supporters to help with Bernie’s campaign, rather than bully them online (which a lot of Sanders supporters were doing). A lot of leftists insisted that bullying Warren supporters online was justified because bullying was never a factor in influencing an already “good” person to change their mind about a political issue. At this point I became convinced that many people who identify as leftist didn’t want to build a mass movement behind some of Sanders’ more popular policy proposals, and just wanted a socially sanctioned way to punish others for the personal injustices they feel they’ve experienced.

    1. Rhyd Wildermuth

      You are absolutely correct in all of this. Thanks for your support.

  7. Kenaz Filan

    I’ve been pleasantly surprised to see you on the fringes I’ve been residing in since 2017. And impressed that you have many of the same concerns I did. After Occupy Wall Street there was an enormous shift away from class consciousness toward race consciousness, BMI consciousness, sexual minority consciousness, disability consciousness, and pretty much EVERY form of consciousness that didn’t mention income inequality.

    Back in the day our rule of thumb was that just about any form of sexual deviance (in the clincal, not the pejorative sense) was acceptable so long as all parties involved were consenting adults. It’s telling that we then started hearing complaints about consent and racism, ableism, transphobia, etc. And recurring comments like “so why is adult/child sex ALWAYS a bad thing?”

    You’re spot on regarding Wilhelm Reich and the idea that the Sexual Revolution was going to schtup its way into a new utopia. It’s why we have crusaders fighting against persecution of “gender identities” that didn’t exist last week. The Frankfurt School recognized that it was easier to get people excited by orgies than economic theory. (To be fair, given a choice between an orgy and reading Das Kapital I think most of us would choose the former… ). Harnessing the sex drive for political revolutions was a clever piece of social engineering, but one that leads to a lot of bourgeois playacting that ultimately shores up the System rather than tearing it down.

  8. karen rom

    I wanted to read your comments at the Unherd site, but the’privacy’ policies of that site are unacceptable to me.

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